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Punonymous
  • Associate Schmeditor
  • Points: 975
  • Rank: 26
  • Schmedlines written: 124
  • Winning Schmedlines: 8
  • Top 10 Schmedlines: 30
1

SKATES ON A PLANE

01/07/2011 -Original Headline: Delta Kicks Entire Russian Hockey Team Off Plane

8
2

BUTTER OFF DEAD

02/21/2011 -Original Headline: Man shot dead for eating Popcorn too loudly

8
3

RIDICOLAS CAGE

12/15/2010 -Original Headline: Nic Cage Goes Ballistic in Romania

7
4

STARBUCKS LOGO BREWS CONTROVERSY

01/06/2011 -Original Headline: Starbucks Debuts New Logo

6
5

INCONVENIENT NEWS CHANNEL

12/16/2010 -Original Headline: Fox Ordered Staff to Diss Global Warming

6
6

DECAPAPULCO

01/09/2011 -Original Headline: 15 Headless Bodies Found In Acapulco

6
7

DO YOU WANT A LAWSUIT WITH THAT?

12/11/2010 -Original Headline: McDonald's Employee Spit on Customer

5
8

BUCHAREST DANGEROUS

12/15/2010 -Original Headline: Nic Cage Goes Ballistic in Romania

5
9

DELAY NOT ABOVE DELAW

01/11/2011 -Original Headline: Tom De Lay gets 3yrs for campaign money laundering

5
10

ME NO HORNY

01/16/2011 -Original Headline: Japan Concerned As Nation's Sex Drive Vanishes

4
11

TOUR DE FRAUD

01/19/2011 -Original Headline: New Information In Case Against Lance Armstrong

4
12

THAT'S A WHORE-AY

01/14/2011 -Original Headline: Italy's Berlusconi in prostitution probe

4
13

SCHMUCK HUNT

12/17/2010 -Original Headline: Object Shot Down Above Israeli Nuclear Plant

3
14

NAZI PARTY FOUL

12/17/2010 -Original Headline: Winona: Mel Gibson Called Me An "Oven Dodger"

3
15

ONLINE DATING SITE BRACES FOR CYBER ATTACK

12/13/2010 -Original Headline: Pre-WikiLeaks Assange's Online Dating Profile

3
16

BEST TAG EVER

12/16/2010 -Original Headline: Zuckerberg Named Person of the Year

3
17

NYC SUBWAY HAS NORMAL DAY

01/14/2011 -Original Headline: rat wakes up sleeping subway passenger

3
18

BAD RATTITUDE

01/14/2011 -Original Headline: rat wakes up sleeping subway passenger

3
19

DEUCE SILVIO: EUROPEAN GIGOLO

01/14/2011 -Original Headline: Italy's Berlusconi in prostitution probe

3
20

ANIMAL'S HOUSE

05/08/2011 -Original Headline: Animal Kingdom wins Kentucky Derby

3
21

CANON FODDER

01/11/2011 -Original Headline: The Pope wants more Christian names

3
22

MANNY SENDS MOSELY PACQUING

05/08/2011 -Original Headline: Manny Pacquiao defeats "Sugar" Shane Mosley

3
23

URBAN OUT, QUITTER

12/09/2010 -Original Headline: Florida Coach Urban Meyer Steps Down

3
24

FATTY WAGON

01/12/2011 -Original Headline: Ambulance adds hydraulic lift for obese patients

3
25

WEAPONS OF MASS CONSUMPTION

01/12/2011 -Original Headline: Sales in Glock Pistols up after Arizona shootings

3
26

CRAW DEAL

12/09/2010 -Original Headline: Red Sox To Sign Carl Crawford To Big Deal

3
27

MEYER: F-U, UF

12/09/2010 -Original Headline: Florida Coach Urban Meyer Steps Down

3
28

PRINCE OF INERTIA: THE SANDERS OF TIME

12/11/2010 -Original Headline: Sen. Sanders Gave 8.5-hour Speech Against Tax Deal

3
29

TRAGEDY RESPONSE FAIL

01/12/2011 -Original Headline: Sales in Glock Pistols up after Arizona shootings

2
30

BANKSTA GRAFT

01/12/2011 -Original Headline: 50 Cent made $9M from tweeting in one weekend

2
31

ROMAN RUINED

12/15/2010 -Original Headline: Violence in Rome after Berlusconi survives vote

2
32

CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET A ROLE?

12/21/2010 -Original Headline: Racists Boycotting Thor Movie Over Black God

2
33

BIRDIES: FULLY LOADED

01/13/2011 -Original Headline: Flying drunk proves fatal for bird flock

2
34

CHICKENHEART

12/17/2010 -Original Headline: Winona: Mel Gibson Called Me An "Oven Dodger"

2
35

SNOOKI TRASH TALKS

01/06/2011 -Original Headline: Snooki Wakes Up In A Garbage Can Once A Month

2
36

ORE-GONE

01/11/2011 -Original Headline: Bizarre play clinches BCS championship for Auburn

2
37

SLEAZE-O ITALIANO

01/14/2011 -Original Headline: Italy's Berlusconi in prostitution probe

2
38

BOY TOY IN COY PLOY FOR FUTURE FLOP

12/10/2010 -Original Headline: Bradley Cooper Endorses New Wonder Drug

2
39

MCWRONGALDS

12/11/2010 -Original Headline: McDonald's Employee Spit on Customer

2
40

BURN AFTER SEIZING

12/10/2010 -Original Headline: Authorities Burn Down Explosive-laden House

2
41

UNSAFE HEX CAUSES BURNING SENSATION

02/26/2011 -Original Headline: Voodoo sex ceremony spawns fatal fire

2
42

MYTHBOOSTERS

02/20/2011 -Original Headline: Team-Builders Spot Lock Ness Monster Rival

2
43

BRINGING OUT THE DEAD (POPE)

02/20/2011 -Original Headline: Pope John Paul To Be Exhumed For Beatification

2
44

LEE-P OF FAITH

12/10/2010 -Original Headline: Rangers Up the Ante For Cliff Lee

2
45

WHEN COMMONERS ATTACK

12/10/2010 -Original Headline: Attack on Prince Charles, Camilla Shocks U.K.

2
46

ALOSI PLANS ON JUST TRIPPING FANS DURING FREE TIME

12/14/2010 -Original Headline: Jets Suspend Coach Who Tripped Player

2
47

TEXODUS

12/14/2010 -Original Headline: Cliff Lee Accepts Late Bid by Phillies

2
48

JEFFS FACES HARD TIME FOR BIG LOVE

12/09/2010 -Original Headline: Polygamist Leader Faces Bigamy Trial

2
49

BALT-NO-MORE

01/16/2011 -Original Headline: Steelers rally to beat Ravens 31-24

2
50

YEP, I'M STRAIGHT

12/09/2010 -Original Headline: Oprah Tells Barbara Walters She’s Not Gay

2

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